Like everything else in life, the dating game is one of the most highly competitive sports out there. Yes, a sport. Between Tinder, Bumble, Intagram, Grindr, POF, eHarmony and the thousand other sites; we are all competing to find the perfect someone. Or at least, someone right now to get a fix.
Even though we are all competing for the same prize, we’ve all dated the same 6 guys. They all come in different packages, but they are the same damn person lol. And if you’re really lucky, you’ll date the guy with all qualities combine!
Your twenties are amazing and filled with dating so lets explore who we’ve dated or about to date shall we? lol
6. The Athlete – He’s tall, fit, handsome and of course has the perfect jaw structure. However, they aren’t the brightest and often self absorbed. They look at themselves in any shiny surface, point out flaws on their dates physique and to be very honest, they aren’t good in bed. Selfish and think sex is a competition that they need to win. Congrats douche, you beat the record and it only took you 10 seconds! Hard pass on this one girls.
5. The pretty boy bragger/ wannabe model – He’s pretty, like really pretty but you know this one. He says he models part time which translates into him taking selfies on snap chat and instagram (where he only has 1000 followers). He doesn’t do anything professionally because “they won’t pay him what he’s worth” lol. Oh and he may or may not be living in his parents basement…. he does. NEXT!
4. The Rebound – constantly talking about his ex or seems bitter about women in general. He’s usually cheap and wants to split everything on dates. And, let’s not forget about asking you advice on what he did wrong to the girl who left him… that’s always fun lol. Drop this one like a bag of dirt. NEXT!
3. The older guy – Finally, someone who might be mature enough to date and can perhaps treat you well. He’s been through it enough so he should know what he wants. Instead, you spend most of your time reassuring him that he’s HIP (his words) not a giant man child (which he is) who just bought himself a red Toyota Solara convertible (ew) to feel younger…ugh. NEXT!
2. The stoner – There’s really no need to describe him. The blank stare and slow responses are enough. MOVING ON!
1. The starving artist – Similar to the hipster but this one is broke. He’s looking for someone to really enjoy his banjo music while he sits on a pan in the middle of Yonge street eating snap peas chips because he’s glutten free, vegan and trying to save dung beetles…. Not going to happen!
While scrolling through the endless and admittedly exhausting options that each app gives, make yourself delicious pumpkin spice waffles. They’ll probably give you more satisfaction in the mornings than the boys would anyway lol.
1 Can of Pumpkin Puree
2 Large Eggs (separated)
1 1/2 Cups of All purpose flour
1 tablespoon of baking powder
1/2 Cup of Brown sugar
1 Teaspoon of Pumpkin Spice extract
1/2 Teaspoon of Salt
1/2 Cup of Granulated sugar
1 Teaspoon of Vanilla
1/2 Cup of Coconut Oil
1/2 Cup of Milk
Method to the Madness
- Preheat Waffle iron
- Whisk coconut oil (liquid form), sugars, puree, egg yolks and milk.
- Add pumpkin spice extract and vanilla.
- In a separate bowl, mix flour, baking powder and salt.
- Stir flour mixture into pumpkin mixture until combined.
- In another bowl, whip egg whites until fluffy with stiff peaks.
- Fold egg whites into pumpkin batter.
- Scoop 3/4 of a cup of the batter onto waffle iron.
- Add Toppings as desired.