Gaslighting Definition: A form of Psychological manipulation in which a person sows seeds of doubt in another individual, making them question their own memory, perception and judgement.
Recently this word has come up quite often in conversations with both sexes. Although we’ve all experienced this at some point in our lives, it’s become more apparent. Crazy to think that this is gaining momentum in an age where we screen shot everything, capture every moment and record every second of the day as though someone in the future may review it.
But do you really know what gaslighting is and are you in a relationship that is making you absolutely crazy right now?
Granted, relationships are hard and confusing and at times unstable. But does your partner make you feel absolutely insane because they never admit fault? Do they always project their insecurities on you and make you feel like the bad person? Do they make promises to you but their actions are the complete opposite and then blame you for something so minuscule as the reasoning for them not delivering on that promise? If the answer is yes to any of these.. guess what? You’re in a toxic relationship.
There’s nothing worse than being so in love with someone and always on the edge of anticipation for something that may never come or change. The endless promises of “being a better version of themselves” or continually saying “I’m sorry” but never changing the behaviour can be devastating.
So how in the world do we break free from the vicious cycle that is this toxic relationship without damaging ourselves? Well, it’s not as easy as walking away. Because we all know when you’re in deep, you can’t just leave. But you can stop feeding into the madness. The fears and doubts accompanied with the never-ending arguments can stop.
When they accuse you of something you didn’t do or deny an action that you’ve clearly caught them in (ie. there’s a used condom stuck to their forehead but deny they had sex… because you know, used condoms just fall from the sky right?). You need to take a deep breath and say these words…
Are you ready? Say it with me…… Deep breath….. and as loud as you can, say …… FUCK OFF!!!!
Then while they look absolutely confused and dazed, simply smile and say that you’re about to make a delicious oversized chocolate chip cookie and they can join you if it pleases them.
The words are simple but effective and as a result, you’ll feel much better telling someone to go fuck themselves and their lies while you enjoy an amazing gooey chocolate chip cookie.
By no means will this advice work for everyone but it’s maybe the first step in taking back your sanity and turning the tables on the one who took it away.
Stay sane beauties!
1 stick (1/2 cup) butter, melted
* 1/2 cup brown sugar
* 1/4 cup granulated sugar
* 2 tsp. vanilla extract
* 1 large egg
* 1 large egg yolk*
* 1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
* 1 tsp. baking soda
* 1/4 tsp. salt
* 1 cup chocolate chips
1. Preheat oven to 350F.
2. In a 9-inch cast iron skillet, melt butter over medium heat, stirring frequently until it begins to turn golden brown; about 3 minutes. Whisk in sugars and vanilla.
3. Remove skillet from heat and allow to cool for about 5 minutes before adding in egg and egg yolk. Whisk gently until well combined. Add flour, baking soda, and salt, stirring until just incorporated. Fold in chocolate chips.
4. Using a spatula, spread the dough until it is evenly distributed in the skillet. Bake for 18-20 minutes until edges begin to turn golden brown and a toothpick inserted into the centre comes out clean.